I was having a conversation with my husband about last weeks coaching sessions. I told him how I spent most of my time helping clients set their goals. And out of the eight people I coached, six of them came to the conclusion that happiness was their goal and all of them wanted balance. His reaction was
Well that isn’t going to happen. What’s there to be happy about?
My coaching session with each client began with where they are in their well-being. Then we started the work on their goal for manifesting better health. This question may sound weird. I actually had to think about the law of attraction to understand what it meant to manifest but also so that I can explain it to a client and they can be clear why this is important information to know.
What I’ve learned is that happiness is a state of mind and if there’s anything blocking that happiness from happening then we will constantly seek ways to reach that happiness. I know there are many ways people use to reach happiness that works just fine for their goals, but for me what I’ve learned about finding happiness is that my body and mind need to be taken care of and that is how I coach my clients. There are quick fix pills, drinks, drugs, and foods that can help you reach that happy state of mind, but it’s temporary and it makes you rely on something other than yourself, which doesn’t always work. Imagine if you were in charge of how you feel. Imagine if you were able to determine your happiness and be in control of how you feel. There’s not a person or a thing that does that for you other than you. I have learned in my years that this was one of the best gifts I can give myself. It sounds strange but when you think about it, the craziness in our world of politics isn’t going anywhere, our lack of control of the weather isn’t going to change and our ability to foresee what the future holds in our finances or health isn’t going to change and to my husband’s point, with all of these obstacles how can I dare say to these clients that happiness is a possible goal.
I spent most of 2016 alone. I don’t mean physically alone, I mean emotionally alone. I needed to. I needed to retreat in order to figure out my life and where it was going. I had a nice home life, a great family, and good solid friendships but at the same time I lost my best friend to brain cancer and closed my company due to a breakdown so happiness seemed like a term I couldn’t really connect with. I did say “I’m grateful” a lot, but I wasn’t sure about happy? I don’t think I was happy. At that time I based my happiness on the success of my company my families healthy habits, my relationships with my mom, my friends and everyone in between. I also later found out that I was in perimenopause, the stage women go through before menopause. That means my hormones were out of wack, lack of progesterone making my estrogen levels high. Bottom-line if I wanted to be happy I needed to know how I can do that with my own body and mind. After a full year of putting that into practice, I know the importance of staying connected with “me” to know more about what I need to show up a better person for those around me and what I can do to be happy when there is no one other than me to make it happen.
As a wellness coach, I live and breath the science and spirituality of body/mind transformation. I have put every bit of extra time into workshops and seminars and books to stay informed and educated on the latest studies and stories that support theories on the law of attraction using body-mind practices.
Happiness is not just a feeling that happens, hormones have to be released the brain needs to be triggered and then a reaction happens. I look at the body as a machine and the brain as it’s engine. If your brain isn’t able to process the hormones that make you feel good properly then you may find yourself constantly seeking the feel-good emotions from things like food and pills. We are chemical beings and if we are feeding the body bad chemicals that react to the good chemicals, then you are likely not going to have happiness in your life that is longer than the moments you give it sugar or alcohol or a pill. Happiness becomes natural when we learn how to use what we feed our bodies and minds to benefit our goal of happiness.
I was forced to learn about my new hormone challenge that causes feelings of depression and heightens anxiety at the same time deal with the darkness of closing my company and losing a best friend meanwhile wanting the feeling of happiness. I took on the challenge and began researching my nutrition essentials and the kind of exercises I should do to stay basically “sane” hoping happiness would follow. It took a year of self-exploration and studies to create a system that worked and what that system involved was wellness rituals.
My response to my husband on
Is happiness possible?
Yes! Absolutely, but you have to want it enough to live a mindful lifestyle to have it.
If you want to be happy follow these simple things daily:
- a gut healing diet plan everyday!
- take time out to connect with your body and mind through meditation
- exercise frequently, for some that means taking a brisk walk for others that means going for a run or strength training, either way, move your body daily